Episode 28: Virtual Kitchen Table: Spot the Learning! How Our Children are Learning More Than We Might Think
Have you ever wondered whether your child is learning enough? Or maybe you suspect there’s more than meets the eye to what they’re taking in through outdoor play, online gaming, the stories they tell, the things they are making or any other number of things? We were so thrilled to have April Scully from @modern.homeschoolers and @heroineofyourstory and Kelly Edwards from the @90minuteschoolday join us to peel back the layers beyond what we might see at first glance and really notice and respect the depth of what our children are pursuing. This is another long episode as we really dig into the specifics of learning as well as our role, process and practical tips as parents. We hope you’ll tune in!
We Discuss:
The mix of skills integrated into any given activity when we look beyond the first glance
Kids picking up the skills they need based on the meaning in their play and the relationships that they have
That “pulling out” the learning helps us with feelings of self-doubt about how much is happening in our days
How profoundly learning is connected to relationship
Observing what naturally comes up for our kids without what we might bring in or teach
Being mindful of not taking over interesting learning opportunities and seeing them all as “teachable moments”
Trusting the process and knowing that learning is happening
Realizing that our child’s mind does not necessarily work the same way ours does! How fascinating it is to see the different details of something a child might notice that pass us by
Letting go of some assumed constraints around the age of using tools such as scissors and knives and giving (supervised) space to explore and experiment
That there is purpose behind all the exploration and potential mess!
Allowing time and space to pursue mastery if wished, reach the end, and really satiate that interest – protecting the time and space to pursue things in depth
“Soft skills” development happening right alongside concrete ones
Our pauses in reaction as being crucial to allowing for our kids’ thoughts and excitement about something to rise up
Being open-minded about the rules of the house – working through what we want the culture of our house to be as far as allowing flexibility for physical play or finding a designated space
That everybody has the right to change their mind – what will work for all of us, parents included?
That we have permission as parents to own our frustration with our environment, share how we’re feeling with our kids and work toward a common solution
Valuing non-academic learning at least as much as academic – there’s very little that kids can’t learn quite quickly once they’re a bit older, experienced and mature
Self-directed competence leading to confidence
Respecting the steps and perseverance that kids move through as they meet large and small goals
Research conducted by Harvard University, Stanford Research Center and Carnegie Foundation on the importance of soft skills
All the “academic” skills and knowledge that go into the pursuit of a child’s learning
How these deep explorations our children do can form core memories in the longterm
The perseverance involved in learning something for just for its own sake
The value of a child learning a goal that isn’t important to anyone else but them – entirely intrinsic
How some kids like to learn what they share in a very encouraging way with others and a piece of the learning is in the retelling
That our children’s natural learning style teaches us a lot about our own preferred way of taking in information and also the ways that aren’t natural to us
How our children sharing their stories with us is a form of writing – an opportunity for them to process, self-edit and more
The value of mixed ages and learning in connection with other people
The abundance of skills developed through gaming – reading, numbers, online etiquette, risk-taking – and how easy they are for us to miss
A story of learning to read and the parental processing that went along with it
Strong interests as being portals to learning so many things
How incredibly different the learning process is outside of school
That our children are not learning for the purpose of performing or “checking boxes” so it’s helpful to be aware of that in how we process our thoughts and respond
How learning in flow is a whole different quality of learning
Practical ideas for creating a culture of deep, natural learning, including ones for parents quite new to a more self-directed style of home education
Resources:
Importance of early years in attachment- Modern Homeschooling
The Soft Skills Disconnect by Nation Soft Skills Association
Honey, I’m Homeschooling the Kids podcast
Virtual Kitchen Table Episode #6: The State of Flow in Learning