Ever Learning

Ever Learning

Eclectic Homeschooling and Beyond

Are we Looking from the Perspective of a Child?

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There was a spot on the highway where, if we were heading east at just the right time, we might be able to see three trains on the three tracks running through the countryside at the same time. This happened early-ish one Saturday morning about 17 years ago as the boys and I were heading to see grandparents. G was in a stage of all things trains. Seemingly inspired by a combination of his grandad’s job on passenger trains as well as good, old Thomas the Tank Engine, he couldn’t get enough. He began collecting toy trains, setting up elaborate train scenes for the train storylines he was acting out, doing train dot-to-dots … everything was wonderfully trains for a period of time. We found lots of awesome train books at the library; some were reference books and some were wonderful stories.
 

Then that morning it happened. We were driving as the sun was still low in the sky and we turned in such a way that for a short time, we were driving parallel to a line of tracks on our left and two lines on our right. As a freight train came out of the trees into our view from the left and ran alongside us, we almost immediately noticed a freight train coming along on the right as well. They were travelling at relatively the same speed and were at approximately the same spot on their respective tracks. This was thrilling enough for little G, shrill voice quickly pointing out both trains and eyes not sure where to look, and then to add to the excitement, a passenger train came zooming by on a second railway line on the right. This was really almost too much for him! Of course, passenger trains are much shorter and faster so it was only about four seconds that we were driving parallel to all three trains, but it was four seconds of high adventure that stuck in G’s mind. It was pretty exciting for me too! As we become more familiar with our children’s interests, we often start to look at things with fresh eyes.

But high adventure? Three trains going by at the same time? It might not seem like a big deal now, almost certainly even to him, but in that moment from the perspective of a child’s mind, it was quite thrilling and cemented a memory.

When do we lose that sense of wonder in relatively ordinary things? How is it that we gradually need more and more to maintain our interest? To entertain us? I imagine it could be said that young children are still discovering the world so things seem fresh and new to them in a way that they don’t to us because we’ve already seen them. That makes sense and yet we haven’t discovered the whole world either. There are all kinds of interesting things out there. I think it’s more likely that the daily grind of life is full and we can’t or don’t take the time to pay attention to what’s around us.
 
Our children can help us do that. I have another memory of G squatting and peering into the grass one day, noticing an ant carrying the crumb of a small goldfish cracker on its back. A bright orange fraction of an already small cracker being hoisted along by a much smaller ant. (Did you know that ants can carry many times their own weight? They have incredible proportional strength.) This was fascinating to him and to me as well, actually, and for a long time it fueled his interest in micro ecosystems. He would often wonder aloud how large and looming his shovel in the sandbox must seem to the ants and what kind of communities were happening in the grass and under the ground without us even knowing.
 
Another point of fascination was the features in cars. “Hey, look, Mum! That car is just like Gran’s, but the rims have a pentagon in the middle instead of a circle.” ?? Who is noticing these things so quickly, while turning a corner? He was. He studied the shapes and designs of vehicles and noticed the details.
 
Variations in colour, shape, animal tracks and tiny insects are all often very obvious to children because they aren’t looking past them to get to the next thing on their list. I know – it’s truly busy. What if we were able to factor in just enough margin to at least see some of them too? And enjoy them along with children when they notice them? Just simple things…
Over the last couple of years, I’ve noticed there are adults who hold this same wonder and joy about everyday things. My husband has a friend who pursues all kinds of interests related to the simple things in life. He experiments with all kinds of food, learns how to play different songs he likes on different instruments and several years ago, became interested in the moon and began taking photos with telephoto lens. (photos of moon below taken by C. Husak and used with permission).
I’ve been trying to pay more attention myself. You can read about that here, here and here. These last few months it’s been about the snow. I’ve always loved snow but this year the snow has fallen at all the right times:). For the first time in about nine winters, I haven’t even once braved snowy roads and sky with a vehicle full of snowboarding boys, white- knuckling the steering wheel and wondering why we hadn’t left the ski hill earlier. There were some winters where this was at least a weekly event!
 
This year I’ve just been able to notice and enjoy.
 
Simple, simple things like the way the shovel stands up perfectly straight in the snow.

The way the snow fills the gaps in the door mats and makes a design. When I look at it sideways, it looks like an owl, does it not?

In early fall, it was about the progression of change.
 
A bit later in the fall, it was about the leaves and the contrast between leaves that had turned colours and those that hadn’t.

Then the other day it was just simply noticing an old version of Robinson Crusoe at a museum, reminding myself that we have one that was my dad’s childhood book when he came over from Scotland and being curious about which edition was older.

Why does any of this matter? Because it slows us down, deepens awareness and gratitude and adds joy!
 
I have long watched the little ones in the nursery at church over the years notice the small things – the pictures on the wall. The birch tree outside the window. The different colours of cars. Tiny details on the pages of books we’re reading. It was a gift to get into that zone with them and imagine things from their perspective because inevitably, I noticed new things too. Their curiosity became shared curiosity as we noticed things together.
 
If you’ve lost some of your curiosity and sense of wonder, I highly recommend slowing down to rediscover it. You can’t do it if you’re rushing around living life on autopilot – I’m discovering this myself! It becomes contagious for your kids, though maybe not right away if you’ve all been really distracted and lost some of it. Our world spins fast these days. Give the idea of noticing the simple stuff some time and gradually try to bring it back it in, starting by doing it yourself. It brings us calm, anchors us and can add a whole lot of joy:).
 

Have you noticed the detailed way that children look at things? Have you ever tried to slow down and see them that way yourself?

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8 thoughts on “Are we Looking from the Perspective of a Child?”

  1. Ashley

    So lovely Erin! I woke this morning very early with one kiddo having trouble getting back to sleep only to have the second child wake early as well. Feeling quite discouraged knowing today we’ll be tough with us each lacking in the sleep department it was nice timing to read this post. I’m going to shift my focus on how today can be a slower day because we are free to keep it slow and keep our eyes open for little delights that will inevitably be around us.

    1. Erin

      Ashley, the timing sounds good, although I’m sorry for the lack of sleep all the way around. It’s interesting because in reading your words, I am seeing things form another angle as well. I writing it, I was thinking of slowing down, being more curious (which you mention), but now it also helps me see it as looking for through the lens of a particular child as far as supporting them in their day and with how they might be feeling (for example, a gentler day because of how they might be feeling from lack of sleep). Of course! Thanks for your insight and comment.:)

  2. Sharon

    Erin, thank you so much for your “looking from the perspective of a child” piece! I have a bad habit of overextending myself and not giving myself the “down time” that I end up craving. I have found that my morning walks on our country road over the past few months have been much more enjoyable, as I have focussed on nature’s little nuances and happenings. Also, I have recently received a delightful book of blank verse poems from a new acquaintance and I have disciplined myself to read only one page a day in order to savour the delightful phrases and images. This definitely “slows (me) down and deepens (my) awareness”. It also gives me something new to look forward to each day!

    1. Erin

      That sounds like a beautiful book and a wonderful idea to read a page a day! Thanks so much for your comment, Sharon:).

  3. Hayley

    Thanks Erin, reading this post was like an oasis of calm in an otherwise stressful morning. Started the day with checking the news far too often and projecting into the future about what may or may not come to pass. Then I visited your site and found this, a powerful and timely reminder to slow down, focus on the present moment and seek out joy and gratitude. Much appreciated 🙂

    1. Erin

      Thank you, Hayley:). It really is hard to know how much to stay in the loop versus taking our mind off of things and focusing on the regular. I’m glad you found it helpful this morning!

  4. Erin

    Hi Mara. Yes, I’m feeling very much the same way. I think it does give us all more time to slow down and pay attention to the small things. I also think it might help us assess priorities/necessities when we don’t have everything immediately available. Thank you for your comment!

    1. Mara

      Lovely🙂 and very good reminder. I find that needing to be in more does at least have the benefit of being forced to slow down and take time for things we might not otherwise. Thank you.

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