There was a spot on the highway where, if we were heading east at just the right time, we might be able to see three trains on the three tracks running through the countryside at the same time. This happened early-ish one Saturday morning about 17 years ago as the boys and I were heading to see grandparents. G was in a stage of all things trains. Seemingly inspired by a combination of his grandad’s job on passenger trains as well as
good, old Thomas the Tank Engine, he couldn’t get enough. He began collecting toy trains, setting up elaborate train scenes for the train storylines he was acting out, doing train dot-to-dots … everything was wonderfully trains for a period of time. We found lots of awesome train books at the library; some were reference books and some were wonderful stories.
Then that morning it happened. We were driving as the sun was still low in the sky and we turned in such a way that for a short time, we were driving parallel to a line of tracks on our left and two lines on our right. As a freight train came out of the trees into our view from the left and ran alongside us, we almost immediately noticed a freight train coming along on the right as well. They were travelling at relatively the same speed and were at approximately the same spot on their respective tracks. This was thrilling enough for little G, shrill voice quickly pointing out both trains and eyes not sure where to look, and then to add to the excitement, a passenger train came zooming by on a second railway line on the right. This was really almost too much for him! Of course, passenger trains are much shorter and faster so it was only about four seconds that we were driving parallel to all three trains, but it was four seconds of high adventure that stuck in G’s mind. It was pretty exciting for me too! As we become more familiar with our children’s interests, we often start to look at things with fresh eyes.
But high adventure? Three trains going by at the same time? It might not seem like a big deal now, almost certainly even to him, but in that moment from the perspective of a child’s mind, it was quite thrilling and cemented a memory.
When do we lose that sense of wonder in relatively ordinary things? How is it that we gradually need more and more to maintain our interest? To entertain us? I imagine it could be said that young children are still discovering the world so things seem fresh and new to them in a way that they don’t to us because we’ve already seen them. That makes sense and yet we haven’t discovered the whole world either. There are all kinds of interesting things out there. I think it’s more likely that the daily grind of life is full and we can’t or don’t take the time to pay attention to what’s around us.
Our children can help us do that. I have another memory of G squatting and peering into the grass one day, noticing an ant carrying the crumb of a small goldfish cracker on its back. A bright orange fraction of an already small cracker being hoisted along by a much smaller ant. (Did you know that ants can carry many times their own weight? They have incredible proportional strength.) This was fascinating to him and to me as well, actually, and for a long time it fueled his interest in micro ecosystems. He would often wonder aloud how large and looming his shovel in the sandbox must seem to the ants and what kind of communities were happening in the grass and under the ground without us even knowing.
Another point of fascination was the features in cars. “Hey, look, Mum! That car is just like Gran’s, but the rims have a pentagon in the middle instead of a circle.” ?? Who is noticing these things so quickly, while turning a corner? He was. He studied the shapes and designs of vehicles and noticed the details.
Variations in colour, shape, animal tracks and tiny insects are all often very obvious to children because they aren’t looking past them to get to the next thing on their list. I know – it’s truly busy. What if we were able to factor in just enough margin to at least see some of them too? And enjoy them along with children when they notice them? Just simple things…
So lovely Erin! I woke this morning very early with one kiddo having trouble getting back to sleep only to have the second child wake early as well. Feeling quite discouraged knowing today we’ll be tough with us each lacking in the sleep department it was nice timing to read this post. I’m going to shift my focus on how today can be a slower day because we are free to keep it slow and keep our eyes open for little delights that will inevitably be around us.
Ashley, the timing sounds good, although I’m sorry for the lack of sleep all the way around. It’s interesting because in reading your words, I am seeing things form another angle as well. I writing it, I was thinking of slowing down, being more curious (which you mention), but now it also helps me see it as looking for through the lens of a particular child as far as supporting them in their day and with how they might be feeling (for example, a gentler day because of how they might be feeling from lack of sleep). Of course! Thanks for your insight and comment.:)
Erin, thank you so much for your “looking from the perspective of a child” piece! I have a bad habit of overextending myself and not giving myself the “down time” that I end up craving. I have found that my morning walks on our country road over the past few months have been much more enjoyable, as I have focussed on nature’s little nuances and happenings. Also, I have recently received a delightful book of blank verse poems from a new acquaintance and I have disciplined myself to read only one page a day in order to savour the delightful phrases and images. This definitely “slows (me) down and deepens (my) awareness”. It also gives me something new to look forward to each day!
That sounds like a beautiful book and a wonderful idea to read a page a day! Thanks so much for your comment, Sharon:).
Thanks Erin, reading this post was like an oasis of calm in an otherwise stressful morning. Started the day with checking the news far too often and projecting into the future about what may or may not come to pass. Then I visited your site and found this, a powerful and timely reminder to slow down, focus on the present moment and seek out joy and gratitude. Much appreciated 🙂
Thank you, Hayley:). It really is hard to know how much to stay in the loop versus taking our mind off of things and focusing on the regular. I’m glad you found it helpful this morning!
Hi Mara. Yes, I’m feeling very much the same way. I think it does give us all more time to slow down and pay attention to the small things. I also think it might help us assess priorities/necessities when we don’t have everything immediately available. Thank you for your comment!
Lovely🙂 and very good reminder. I find that needing to be in more does at least have the benefit of being forced to slow down and take time for things we might not otherwise. Thank you.